


Confessions

by nekocrouton



Category: Left 4 Dead 2
Genre: Collaboration, Developing Relationship, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-29
Updated: 2015-11-29
Packaged: 2018-05-04 00:34:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5313092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nekocrouton/pseuds/nekocrouton
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This has been a long time coming collaboration with my friend <a href="http://archiveofourown.org/users/Karukara/pseuds/Karukara">Karukara.</a>  She wanted a story where Ellis is hanging on a ledge because there really aren't very many stories where that's integrated in, so I gave her my idea and she liked it.  So here it <i>finally</i> is, after struggling to write it out for a while.  I hope that you like it, Karu!~</p>
<p>Nick/Ellis.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Confessions

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Karukara](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Karukara/gifts).



Ellis didn’t know _how_ it had happened. One minute he was running across a bridge littered with cars while fighting the seemingly endless horde of zombies that were coming at him, and then the next minute he was dangling from the side of that same bridge, clinging on for dear life while he called out for help from his teammates. Fortunately he just _barely_ managed to grab onto the narrow metal edge after somehow stumbling off of the roadway, otherwise he would _probably_ be at the bottom of the river by now. But he sure as hell didn’t want to think about _that_ grim possibility.

 

“Help, help!” He cried out, not even sure if the rest of his team was anywhere _nearby_ to hear his pleas. Ellis clung to the beam as hard as he could bear, the steel growing warm with the day’s sun while his muscles slowly fatigued the longer he hung on. “I’m on this here ledge!” Ellis tried again, but unfortunately for him, it seemed like his teammates were nowhere close enough to respond to his cries for help.

 

_Man, this is not how I wanna go out_ , Ellis thought to himself as gravity pulled him down, and he struggled slightly to keep a firm grip on the edge. Working long, grueling days at the auto shop before the apocalypse hit had built his upper body strength up, but he wasn’t _entirely_ sure how long he’d be able to hold out. Unfortunately for him, one of his hands slipped slightly due to the sweat starting to build up on his palms, and he gasped as he dropped a little bit lower. Even though he managed to recover, it was starting to get _much_ harder for him to maintain his hold. “C’mon guys, I can’t hang here much longer!” Ellis’ cries were beginning to get more desperate with each passing minute that he dangled from the bridge.

 

His mind started to flit to thoughts of his family, his buddy Keith and his friend Dave, people that he thought he might have had a _chance_ to see again someday, even though deep in his heart he knew the sad truth was that it was pretty likely that all of his loved ones were dead. But despite that fact, he still had others that he had grown close to, Coach and Rochelle and… Nick. He honestly didn’t know _what_ to make of Nick. One minute the guy would be poking fun at him over the way he talked or how _excited_ he got over things, and the next minute he’d be complimenting him on his shooting skills. But despite the conflicting things that Nick would say, he thought that he was a pretty _cool_ guy. And yeah, maybe he had a little bit of a _crush_ on the slick-looking fellow, to where they had shared a clumsy, rain-soaked kiss back at the Sugar Mill, but Nick was so damn hard to _read_ sometimes, so he really didn’t know _what_ the gambler thought of him. Especially when Nick acted like nothing had happened whenever Ellis tried to bring up the tender moment. But with how he was losing his grip on the bridge and _fast_ , Ellis feared that he may _never_ find out.

 

“ _Help_!” Ellis cried out, squeezing his eyes shut as he mustered up the loudest voice that he could. When he opened his eyes back up, he was hopeful to see one of his teammates there to rescue him, but instead, he saw a pair of black, beady eyes peering down. “Oh shit!” He got out fearfully, his blood running ice cold when he realized that his voice had attracted the infected over to where he was hanging, and he was absolutely _powerless_ to do anything about it. The zombie gave a shriek before it started kicking at Ellis’ fingers, and Ellis could only shout at the infected person in hopes of getting it to stop, as useless as it likely would be. “Ow! Cut that shit out! Damn!” Even though the infected were essentially rotting flesh, the hits still _hurt._ The pain wasn’t doing _anything_ to help his situation, and his grip loosened to the point where his left hand slipped off of the beam. As his left arm dangled uselessly next to him, his right hand now was the _only_ thing that was keeping him from falling to his certain death, and he was much too fatigued to even attempt to regain his two-handed grip.

 

_Well, looks like this is it,_ Ellis thought sadly through his cries of pain. _I jus’ hope that when I hit the bottom, it’s fast an’ painless._ He could feel himself starting to choke up a little bit, having gotten so damn _close_ to being rescued only to have done something stupid, and now he was going to _die_ because of it. It was so dumb and _unfair_ , and he was pissed off at himself for it. Just as he almost couldn’t bear the cramping pain in his hand and tense muscles anymore, and he actually contemplated letting _go_ , he heard a gunshot. Suddenly the infected that had been so keenly interested in him slumped over in death due to a bullet between the eyes, and easily slid off the bridge into the water below. Ellis’ heart swelled when he realized that he was going to be rescued after all, and he cried out, “I’m right here! Oh Lord, _help me_!”

 

A figure crouched over where he was hanging, and Ellis couldn’t quite make out who it was at first, but when he saw a flash of white and a glint of gold on the hand that reached out for him, he immediately knew who his rescuer was. “Holy shit, am I ever glad to see ya Nick!” He exclaimed in relief. “I thought I was a goner!”

 

Nick grasped at Ellis’ forearm and began to pull the mechanic up from the ledge. “Come on fireball, let’s get you back up here,” he got out with a grunt, finding that Ellis was definitely a _lot_ heavier than he looked to be.

 

When Ellis was sure that the conman had a good grip on him, he let go of the bridge and hung on to Nick’s arm instead. Once he had been tugged up about halfway, he managed to pull his legs up and press the heels of his boots against the ledge to give him a little more stability and to ease the burden on his rescuer as well. As soon as he climbed back up onto the metal structure, he scrambled to get to standing. “I thought fer sure that I was gonna die there, holy _shit_ ,” he exclaimed as he hurriedly got up to his feet, his lungs burning with exhaustion as he spoke. In his excitement though, he managed to stumble on a chunk of uneven pavement which caused him to lurch forward. Luckily for him, but maybe not so much for his rescuer, Nick was there to keep him from falling back down to the ground, and so Ellis ended up smacking his face right in the middle of his chest. “Oh shit, I’m sorry man!” He got out, flushing slightly at the embarrassment of what he had just _unintentionally_ done. Fortunately for him, his face was already red from the exertion of hanging on for dear life just moments ago, so his blush was easily hidden. Ellis didn’t move back from Nick right away, since he kind of _liked_ the close presence of the other man, especially with how thankful he was for having been saved. Bravely, he wrapped his arms around the conman in a loose hug. “Thanks Nick. I mean it. I dunno what I would’ve done without ya.”

 

Nick just raised an eyebrow when he was suddenly tugged into a hug by the thankful mechanic. “Yeah, yeah,” he muttered as he shrugged himself out of Ellis’ grip. “Look, we’ve got to catch up to Coach and Ro if we want to get the hell off of this bridge, so grab your shit and let’s get moving, okay sport? That helicopter _ain’t_ going to wait forever for us.”

 

Ellis nodded in understanding, although he didn’t particularly _like_ being shoved aside by Nick so hastily. It kind of hurt his feelings, especially since in his mind he thought that he and Nick had a sort of _connection_ , but he guessed they really didn’t have time for any of that at the moment. _I reckon that kiss was jus’ a fluke or somethin’. Maybe. Hell, I dunno._ “Okay, let’s go,” he agreed as he pulled his shotgun from his back and got himself situated, quickly pushing away the painful sting of rejection. “I dunno what else we might come across here, but I am _ready_ to kick its ass. We ain’t gonna miss that chopper, that’s fer sure.”

 

“Atta boy,” Nick said with a tiny grin as he bent down to pick up his assault rifle from the ground, having had dropped it in his haste to save Ellis. “Let’s go kick some zombie ass.”

 

The run on the bridge was just as grueling as anyone would have expected. Even despite Ellis and Nick meeting up with the other half of their team, dodging Chargers who wanted nothing _more_ than to send them over the edge of the bridge to their watery death, or avoiding cars slung around by a Tank was no _easy_ task. With yet another Tank hot on their heels, the foursome hobbled their way towards the helicopter, with Ellis practically _dragging_ an out-of-breath Nick into the metal bird.

 

“Man, that Smoker really did a number on ya,” Ellis commented worriedly as he eased Nick onto the metal bench. “Are ya gonna be all right?” Once he had helped Nick get seated, he plopped down right next to the conman and got his first aid kit out onto his lap. “I didn’t _mean_ fer ya to be hangin’ there longer than you were, it was jus’ that Hunter was goin’ fer Ro an’…”

 

“Cool it kiddo, it’s okay,” Nick rasped out as he rubbed at his chest, which felt like it was _heavily_ bruised by now. “I’m alive, you’re alive, and we all goddamn _made it_. I don’t know how we fucking did it, but we _did_. That’s all that matters now.” He gave Ellis a weak smile as he attempted to catch his breath.

 

Once Coach and Rochelle had settled into the helicopter on the other side, the pilot wasted no time in getting off of the ground. And it wasn’t a moment too soon, because literally as soon as they had gotten up into the air, the Tank that was tailing them showed up with a rumble and barely missed grasping at the tail of the chopper with its beefy hand. It howled in fury as the helicopter flew _just_ out of reach of its thick fingers. “Holy shit, that was close!” Ellis exclaimed with a worried look on his face as he leaned back to peer out the small window and saw the angry Tank raging down below. The excitement didn’t stop there though, because once they got a little ways away from the bridge, the nearly-deafening sound of explosions rang through the small compartment, signifying that the military was finishing the job of blowing the bridge to smithereens.

 

“Holy _shit_ ,” Nick got out as he turned to look out the window just in time to see the structure of the bridge collapse spectacularly into the water below. “I guess they were _serious_ about that.” His words were punctuated by a hiss of pain, and he clutched at his side. “ _Goddammit._ That bastard really got me good.”

 

“Lemme help ya,” Ellis insisted, tugging a bottle of pills from inside his health kit. “These should help with the pain at least, I jus’ hope that ya didn’t break nothin’.” He popped the bottle open and tipped a couple of the tablets into the gambler’s hand. “I ain’t got no water or nothin’ like that, you’ll have to take ‘em dry.”

 

“That’s fine,” Nick agreed as he glanced down to his open palm. “I’ve been kind of used to not having anything to chase this shit down with anyway.” He chuckled dryly before tossing the pills into his mouth, grimacing at the chalky taste as he swallowed them down. “Thanks, El.”

 

The sound of the nickname sent a flutter of _something_ through his chest, and Ellis shook his head. “No man, I should be the one thankin’ you. You were the one who saved my ass on the bridge back there, _fer real_.” He looked down at his lap and fidgeted, but suddenly, somehow, he mustered up the courage to ask the gambler a question that he really wanted the answer to. No, he _needed_ the answer to. “Nick, I…” Ellis barely got out as he glanced back up at the conman, but he was surprised when he suddenly heard a wheezy, breathless chuckle come from the direction of the older man, a noise that he had gotten kind of used to _and_ fond of.

 

“I can’t believe it kiddo, we _actually_ made it,” Nick exclaimed with a laugh, his voice still sounding strained from the beating that his ribs had taken in the last moments on the bridge. “It feels like a goddamn dream, is this real?”

 

“It’s _real_ all right,” Ellis answered, allowing himself to give a laugh as well once he heard the conman sounding so _happy_. “Do ya need me to pinch ya or somethin’ so that you believe it?” He asked with a lopsided grin, finding that Nick’s elation was somewhat contagious.

 

“Nah, I’m good,” Nick replied with a smile and a shake of his head, closing his eyes and finally allowing himself to slump back and _relax_ into his seat. “I still just can’t believe that we actually got _out_ of there. After all of these weeks of almost fucking _dying_ in the middle of nowhere, the odds were sure as hell against us.”

 

“Yeah man, it’s almost like a dream come true,” Ellis said with a nod. “Well, besides all the zombies an’ shit. I mean, it don’t look like those are gonna go away fer a while.” He chuckled softly at his words while scratching at the back of his neck awkwardly, his fingertips getting slick with sweat from the skin beneath his cap. _Well, I reckon this is as good a time as any to ask him now. Since he’s in a good mood an’ all._ Ellis inhaled a sharp breath before speaking again, steeling his nerves that had annoyingly flared up. “So uh… Nick. I…” His tone was a lot quieter than usual, his voice just _barely_ loud enough to be heard over the whirring of the helicopter blades, and he was suddenly feeling downright _shy_. _Jus’ say it man, c’mon._ “…I was wonderin’, do ya like me?” He couldn’t help but laugh nervously once the words tumbled out from between his lips, while he quickly turned his head away from Nick so that the other man couldn’t see his embarrassment. But that didn’t stop him from continuing to talk. “’Cuz I mean, there was that time at the Mill an’ all, an’ I thought that _maybe_ there was a chance of ya likin’ me, ‘cuz uh… well, I kinda like _you_.” Ellis’ cheeks burned red and hot once the words left his mouth, and he found himself unable to look over at the gambler after his confession. He expected Nick to start laughing at him, or even _punch_ him for saying what he did, so he was downright _surprised_ when a ringed hand reached out and gently grabbed him by his knee. Ellis quickly whipped his head up in order to catch a glimpse of Nick’s face, more than _glad_ when he saw him grinning at him with one eye open.

 

“I like you too, kiddo,” Nick admitted lowly as he lazily glanced over at Ellis, the pain pills having started to take effect on him. He ignored the other half of his team who were sitting across from him, figuring that they had better shit to do than to listen in on their conversation, especially after Rochelle had gotten a small taste of the Hunter’s claws. He could see Coach wrapping some bandages around her arm from the corner of his eye while he continued to speak to Ellis. “I didn’t _want_ to say anything about it before, because well…” He paused. “I had to keep myself… I had to keep _us_ safe.” He chuckled as he met Ellis’ blue eyed stare. “I know myself too well, kiddo. If we had started hooking up, getting into a relationship or anything like that, we might not be here now.” Nick licked his lips while he thought out what he was going to say next. “It’s why I’ve always kept up the lifestyle I’ve had before all this shit went down, all the drifting and shit. Getting involved with people just gets in the way and it’s distracting. It’s easier to just fuck someone once and leave them in the morning. Why do you think my wife left me when I wasn’t bringing home the money that she was used to?” His eyes narrowed briefly as he remembered the painful memory, but he then dragged a hand through his sweat-slicked hair and took a breath before continuing on. “You didn’t need to know all of that. Sorry, sport.” He smiled weakly at the mechanic. “Anyway, I didn’t wanna get distracted from living, from surviving. So I had to push you away.” Nick gave a little snort while he shook his head, figuring that the drugs were partially what were causing him to spill his guts to the little guy. “I totally get it if you don’t believe me, because I know, I can be an asshole and I talk some shit. But what I’m saying now is all true.” He gave Ellis a smirk. “I like you kid, even if you can talk my ear off sometimes… Or all of the time.”

 

Ellis could hardly believe his ears when Nick _actually_ said that he _actually_ liked him back. His heart kind of flip-flopped in his chest when he heard the conman’s own confession, and once Nick was done talking, he couldn’t help but slide closer to the other man so that their thighs touched. “I like ya a _lot_ ,” he said with an elated grin. “So does that mean that we can maybe…? Ya know…” Ellis looked down briefly. “Be together an’ stuff? Now that we’re safe?”

 

Nick tilted his head back and laughed. “We’re still in the air kiddo, we’re not completely safe,” he teased with a wink. “But I mean, yeah… if you want to take your chances with someone like me in this godawful world, that’s your choice.”

 

Ellis’ eyes widened at the words, and the huge smile that was now seemingly permanently plastered on his face almost made his cheeks _hurt._ He was overwhelmed by _everything_ ; the fact that they were now flying towards safety, how everyone seemed to be okay after all the shit they’d been through, and now _this_. The happiness that he was feeling caused his body to just move, to _react_ , and as he clambered up onto the metal bench so that he could get even _closer_ to Nick, he briefly thought, _I’m sorry Coach an’ Ro,_ before planting an eager kiss on the conman’s thin lips. The kiss was good, even _better_ than the one that they had shared back at the Sugar Mill, and when he felt a hand creep up and gently cup his jaw, he _swore_ that he could also feel Nick grinning into the kiss. _Yeah, I’m willin’ to take the chance. It’s sure as hell worth it after everythin’ after all._


End file.
